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Monday, February 17, 2014

Backyard Adventures: The Great Escape Part 1

“Steel, Sergeant, United States Army, 3-44-44-33.”

I sat with my back against the concrete wall behind my family’s car port; my arms stretched out and held by imaginary chains. Hid from the world, and more importantly from my mother thanks to the large tree that blocked the kitchen window from the backyard, I underwent torturous interrogations. Only three days prior my grizzled World War II persona had been captured following a disastrous trampoline drop behind enemy lines, and now, locked in a dark room deep within a Nazi POW camp, I was paying the price.  

“Uuse zee metal pipe. This time akross zee face.”

A uniformed guard wearing the dual lightning bolt patch of the SS obeyed the order. He walked slowly to a nearby table, picked up an old copper pipe from an array of tools, needles, and knifes and then, facing me again, raised his arm to attack.

I smiled and laughed, “Ha! You think I’ve never been beaten before? Never tortured?”

Down came the copper pipe striking me flush against the cheek. Pain seared from loosened teeth and a lightly fractured jaw, but I only laughed again and raised an eyebrow to the Gestapo officer performing the interrogation. “Where’d you find this guy, the flag corps?”